Success. Sucksess? Isn't that how it should really be spelled?
Like I suck less then I did before?
Sorry. I'm just saying.. isn't that what the word is? Or How can I suck less forever?
I mean really people lets think about it. Our whole culture is mapped upon it. There are magazines, books, seminars, classes, audiobooks, apps, television shows, radioshows, podcasts... I mean everything is about how to be more successful.
How do I suck less at my business? At making money? At being Happy? Friendships? Or in Relationships? Or if you are in a relationship.. How can you suck less in bed? I mean there are a multitude of topics of this word SUCCESS.
And even when you are " successful" ... there are even books, audiobooks, podcasts, websites, articles, classes, teachings, magazines on how to be MORE Successful.
What does this even mean?
I keep asking myself. What does Success even mean.
To me it means- Happy, Healthy, Money, Growing, Better than, Open, Thriving, Competitive, Honest, Transcendent, Transforming, Inspirational, Jeep Wrangler, Motivational, Marriage, Children, a Beautiful home, winter home, summer home... the list goes on and on.. but you get my drift.
But to YOU -it donned on me today while I was pumping my gas- you might have a completely separate definition of the term Success. You might think it means Range Rover, Spain, Milan, India, Happily Single, Five Businesses, 10 Million in the Bank, Face on the cover of Time magazine.... you could be that hippy dippy hipster who is like Success is no car, nice bike, good shoes, nice hair cut, nice computer, camera, case, equipment.. who knows.
I was speaking to one of my best friends, who just had her second child.. at home with her two children and speaking at the lack of success she feels. I'm like woman! You just had a baby! A baby!
As most of you know, I couldn't be further from settling down- but I see Her success. I feel her success in my heart. I'm happy for her.
I've been doing some coaching with a friend in Truro. And today we did a mediation that I will share with you.. and my outcome surprised me.
She said close your eyes and walk me through a "perfect day".
So I closed my eyes and where this took me was here:
Warm sunlight coming through the window, beaming on my face. The faint shadows of leaves on the white walls across from me. A nice warm breeze. Bathingsuits and jean shorts in my closet. Sundresses galore. Someone in the other room making me breakfast. A smoothie. Walking on white tile to the kitchen. Stone beige counter tops. Where I find this vague outline of a man with super tan skin and dark hair. I feel warm. Comfortable. Throw on the jean shorts. Darla runs over to me and we go for a nice long walk on the beach. I catch up with him on the beach. Walking my toes through the ocean. He's surfing. We kiss. Night comes. Fresh avocados and rice and corn tortillas. Hammock. The night air sweeping across my suntouched skin. Restful untouchable. We lay there under the stars. And sleep.
Sounds amazing right? Simple? How did I end up somewhere tropical? I think do I really want to move everything down to Costa Rica?
And then it donned on me. Nothing about my " perfect day" had anything to do with Money, Want, Comparison, Work. Everything that I spend most of my days doing was not in my perfect day. There was no music. No Photography. No friends..No yoga. Just warm air, a beach, a dog, a sexy man, food, ocean, sand, jeanshorts, hammock, avacados, sleep.
I ask you to take a second and think what does your "perfect day" look like...
So I think. Yes this day would be GREAT to have. But if I had to have this day every day... how could that really be my perfect day. It gets me thinking that maybe having this "perfect day" is really something out of fantasy land. ITs not real.
I'm not trying to be negative here. I am just trying to point out something which is this.
Maybe the "success" or our "perfect day" is really just an illusive imaginative cognitation that doesn't really exist. Where we work all our lives for this growth under our skin to just stay put. To get to the place where we can say " This is IT".
What I'm trying to say is if we keep living like this when will it stop? When will the real essence of living really arrive?
IF we are constantly trying to outdoo ourselves and others. Make things better. Make things taller. Or stronger.
How do we really ever get Happy?
“Find out who you are and figure out what you believe in. Even if it's different from what your neighbors believe in and different from what your parents believe in. Stay true to yourself. Have your own opinion. Don't worry about what people say about you or think about you. Let the naysayers nay. They will eventually grow tired of naying.”
Thanks- Ellen DeGeneres.
So stop worrying about Success. Or Sucking less.
Find out who you are and GO BE IT. Trust IT. LOVE IT. OWN IT.
TO me that is the only REAL Success in life.
And maybe one day we can join each other in a Hammock under the stars :)
Love and light <3